The Food and Drug Administration has approved selling the overdose-reversal drug Narcan without a prescription, a move long sought by advocates to aid the national response to the opioid crisis. What do you think?Read more…
Category: The Onion
Indictment Finally Closes Chapter On Media Coverage Of Donald Trump
NEW YORK—Explaining that the matter could at long last be put to rest, the nation’s major news outlets announced Thursday that this week’s indictment of the former president would finally close the chapter on media coverage of Donald Trump. “Now that h…
Trump: ‘All Arrests Are Politically Motivated As The Legal System Is The Codified Exercise Of Political Power’
PALM BEACH, FL—Responding to the news that the Manhattan District Attorney had indicted him over payments to adult film actress Stormy Daniels, former President Donald Trump denounced the move Friday, telling reporters, “All arrests are politically mo…
Desperate Trump Flees To Remote Island Of Manhattan
PALM BEACH, FL—Pushing a hastily packed steamer trunk filled with clothes and money aboard his yacht before setting sail for the open seas, a desperate Donald Trump reportedly fled Friday for the remote island of Manhattan. “It’ll be a long journey—alm…
Tucker Carlson: ‘Trump Is Being Unfairly Persecuted While There Are Still Blacks’
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Breaking: MAGA Patriots Donate Here To Help Protect Our Beautiful President Trump
In order to PUT AN END TO THE INJUSTICE perpetrated by Manhattan District Attorney ALVIN BRAGG’s recent INDICTMENT of our BELOVED LEADER, MAGA PATRIOTS can now DONATE HERE to HELP PROTECT OUR BEAUTIFUL PRESIDENT TRUMP. The BEST PRESIDENT THIS COUNTRY H…
Manhattan Prosecutors Bag Impressive Trophy Indictment
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FBI Investigating Fourth-Grade Kid Who Said He Has Seen Over 200 Dead Bodies
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Bouncer At L.A. Club Checking IMDB Pages At The Door
LOS ANGELES—Operating in accordance with local laws, the bouncer at an L.A. nightclub was reportedly checking Internet Movie Database pages at the door, sources confirmed Friday. “Okay, people, please have your IMDB pages open on your phone by the time…
NFL Owners Announce Secret Meeting To Make Sure They Aren’t Colluding Against Lamar Jackson
PHOENIX—In an effort to investigate claims that they were conspiring to suppress the market for the Baltimore Ravens quarterback, NFL owners announced Friday that they had held a secret meeting to make sure they weren’t colluding against Lamar Jackson….