Category: The Babylon Bee

Wife Stocks Up During One Of Ulta’s 17 Sales That Only Happen Once A Year

MURRIETA, CA—Local wife Amy Walkwell has stocked up on her makeup and beauty supplies once again at her local Ulta store, informing her husband that she had to spend hundreds of dollars right now because the current Ulta sale only happens once a year, 17 times a year. The 17-times-in-a-year opportunity doesn’t come every day, she argued, pointing out that if she didn’t buy her eyeliner, mascara, and whatever the one for the face skin is, she’d have to wait until roughly three weeks from now for the next sale. “We’re saving a ton of money here, and I’ll miss out if I don’t pick this up now,” she said as he dropped her off in front of the store and went to go find a parking spot, where he’d be sitting in his car for roughly an hour. “Really, we’re making money if you think about it. Because if I bought it during any of the 42 days of the year where Ulta isn’t having a sale, I’d have spent at least 20% more.”

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German Health Minister: ‘We Must Take Large Groups Of Unvaccinated And Concentrate Them Into Special Camps’

BERLIN—German Health Minister Jens Spahn has announced his aggressive plan to fight COVID, which will include gathering all the unvaccinated people and putting them in special secured areas where they won’t bother anyone. 

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