Category: Portland Mercury

(Roller) Skating Is Not a Crime!

by Anonymous

I was about 30 minutes into relearning how to roller skate when you walked past. “Don’t you know that you’re ruining the surface of the tennis court?” you snarled…having just…

I’m Sorry

by Anonymous

To the cute guy who just witnessed my awkward tinder make-out sesh where my cheeks/double chin was pinched like a chubby baby’s mid kiss, I am so sorry. You and I are both scar…

Sorry Tracy

by Anonymous

Saturday 10:45 pm SE Powell and 21st You got a fast car and you have at least two friends who have fast cars too You going down to the arco and you don’t care bout no red light…